My Perfect Brother With All The Flaws He Has

My Perfect Brother
(After Last Night Tragedy)


My perfect brothers don’t know what they got till it’s gone.
My perfect brothers forgot that I’m still around and have a feeling.
My perfect brother…

My perfect brother doesn’t feel the love surround him till it’s burned.
Burned to ashes.
My perfect brother doesn’t know that I care the most,
Till I got sick of him and explode.
My perfect brother doesn’t realize that I lift him so high,
So he can crush me in every step he takes.
But I’m already broken to pieces.
My perfect brother doesn’t care that I love him to the point I’ll sacrifice everything for him.
Even my own happiness till it’s all disappeared.
Vanish with the wind.
My perfect brother doesn’t think that he is important to me,
But he went away and leave me alone.
In this cruel world, with uneasy feeling about how his day is.
But that’s okay for me, because he is my brother, my perfect brother with all his flaws.

My perfect brother doesn’t know that I loved him so much,
But now I loathe him equally.
My perfect brother doesn’t care that I care and worried sick about him all the time.
But the result is I don’t want to think about him nor talk about him and say his name anymore.
My perfect brother doesn’t think about the hurt feeling he gave towards this family,
In case we still called as a family after this explosion.
Just in case we forget and called us as one of family.
And now I want him to feel the pain he caused us to feel.
But that’s okay, because he is my brother, my perfect brother with all his flaws.

My perfect brother never cared about me, about us, about this broken family.
But worse come to the worse, he not caring about my mothers’ feeling if she knows about this.
Our mother heart if she’s here with us, if she sees the damage we’ve done to this home.
What about her?
Do you even think about this, brother?
Do you think she wants this?
Do you?
Do you realize the hurt and disappointment you gave her?
Do you care? Not?
That’s okay, because I still do, and will always do, I care and always care.
And that’s okay, you are perfect, my perfect brother who never done wrong.
My perfect brother with all the flaws he has.

My perfect brother never knew, how hard for me to turn my back to him.
My perfect brother never knew, how I suffer to stop the further damage and try to fix it.
My perfect brother never knew, how I always hope and wish all the best for him.
My perfect brother never knew, how my pride is breaks and hurt just to defend him from others.
My perfect brother never knew, how I tried not to hate him with all the scar he gave me.
My perfect brother never knew, how I swallow all the disappointment he throws in me.
My perfect brother never knew, how I struggle with what I go through just to sacrifice to him.
My perfect brother never knew it all, he just knows what he went through and about himself.
But that’s okay, because he is my brother, my perfect brother with all the flaws in him.

My perfect brother,
I love him when I loathe him equally.
I care to him to the core to him get the pain and learnt from it.

My perfect brother with all the flaws he has.
Never come back, but still around.


08.12.2015
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